Tiếng anh
In my family, my mother is the one you love the most. This year my mother is over thirty years old but my mother is very young. Petite figure. Face oval, radiant. Black hair is always neatly combed. Black eyes looked at me so kindly and affectionately. Usually my mother wakes up early to clean up and prepare breakfast for the whole family. Mom cooks very well, I most shrimp soup of mother cooking. In the evening, my mother taught me to study songs, which I do not understand, my mother told me right away. Then my mother put me to sleep with the fairy tale mother told me, giving wings for her dream. I love my mother and try to pick up a lot of flowers to give her ten points.
Tiếng Việt
Trong gia đình em, mẹ là người mà em yêu quý nhất. Năm nay mẹ đã ngoài ba mươi tuổi rồi nhưng mẹ còn trẻ lắm. Dáng người nhỏ nhắn. Khuôn mặt trái xoan, rạng rỡ. Mái tóc đen mượt lúc nào cũng được chải gọn gàng. Đôi mắt đen nhánh nhìn em thật hiền từ và đấy trìu mến.Thường ngày mẹ dậy thật sớm để dọn dẹpvà chuẩn bị bữa sáng cho cả nhà. Mẹ nấu ăn rất ngon, em thích nhất món canh bí tôm của mẹ nấu. Tối đến, mẹ thường dạy em học bài, bài nào em chưa hiểu,mẹ giảng cho em ngay. Rồi mẹ đưa em vào giấc ngủ với những câu chuyện thần tiên mà mẹ kể, chắp cánh những ước mơ cho em. Em rất yêu mẹ và cố gắng hái được nhiều bông hoa điểm mười để tặng mẹ.
An important person who has influenced my life in most positive way is my mother. Nothing in the world can compare with the true love and care of my mother. She is not only my mother but also my friend and my great teacher. She taught me how to be brave, honest and kind to everyone. She also showed me how to give and take. Although she is very busy, she always spares her time for her family. She is always the first one to get up and prepare breakfast for us. She is the first person to come up my mind and movatie whenever I have difficulties. In conclusion, I always consider my mom as the most perfect woman in the world and I do want to say ''I love you, mom. I can't live without you!''
This example shows how one student approached the writing prompt “What is your favorite day of the week and why?” The original draft has some interesting ideas but overall, the paragraph wanders. It includes both relevant and irrelevant details and lacks the coherent focus required for a successful paragraph.
In Time4Writing courses, students are taught that the revision process is vital to writing successful paragraphs. They learn how to use this key step to eliminate unnecessary details and write a tightly structured paragraph.